All I Can Say Is Aloha?
by Erin Faith
Summary: It's some *loved* Professor's 40th birthday...the Marauders plan a surprise party... (finished!)
1. The Ingenious Plan

Sirius Black stood in front of a scowling James Potter, whose brown eyes were looking up at Sirius dubiously. Sirius's face was quite the opposite, he stood with his arms crossed and a grin playing across his tannish face. 

"C'mon James!" Sirius looked down at James with what was his 'girl-getter' look. It was quite obvious that James wasn't going to fall for it, and Sirius wouldn't have made the look if he could help it. But he couldn't, because this was his usual expression for getting something he wanted. What he wanted, this time, was different for what the expression was usually used for. 

"Don't tell me you're going along with this, Remus!" James turned his eyes to Remus, who was standing alongside Sirius with a hidden smile, but his eyes were twinkling. Remus opened his mouth, and it immediately formed into a smile-sort of O, making his dimples pop out. He merely laughed, which made James roll his eyes. 

"C'mon James, it'll be fun!" Sirius tried again, and James fixed him with a glare, which only made Sirius smirk harder. 

"What're you fixing poor James into now?" came a new voice that was qualified as Lily's as she sat down next to James and stared up at Sirius. He and Remus exchanged quick glances and then looked back at Lily. 

"Nothing," Sirius said maybe a little too quickly, and Lily raised an eyebrow. 

"Oh, right, like I'm going to believe _that_," she rolled her eyes and which made Sirius sputter out, "You don't believe me? When have I ever lied to you?" 

At this point James and Remus both burst out laughing, which made Lily smile, and Sirius fix a glare on his two best friends. Sirius glaring was quite a sight to see, his nose obviously didn't agree with his eyes at the expression, and it scrunched up, forcing his mouth into a rather sour look, and all the while his eyes were reduced to slits. He looked like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. Lily promptly leaned on James's shoulder with laughter that was shaking her body as she clutched her stomach. Remus was doubled over and James's shoulders were curled forward as he laughed with air through his nose. 

"All right, shut up," Sirius smirked, and the laughter eventually trailed off, leaving the three with grins. 

"Really, Sirius, what are you planning?" Lily asked as soon as she trusted her mouth to speak and not break off into insane laughter again. 

But Sirius only gave her a smug look and crossed his arms again and replied, "Nothing." 

"Don't worry Lily, you'll find out soon enough," Remus grinned, and received a half glare from Sirius. 

"C'mon James," Sirius reached down and grabbed his best friend's arm and pulled him off of the couch, and the three proceeded to go up the stairs leading to the boy's dorms, with Sirius taking up the end and waving a sardonic hand in Lily's direction as the three disappeared. 

Sirius shut the door behind him and casually strode over to sit on his bed, facing Remus and James who were looking at him curiously. 

"Are you seriously going to do it, Sirius?" asked Remus, who looked as though he were clearly enjoying the idea. James however did not. 

"No, he is _not_ going to do it," James frowned and crossed his arms, which made his age-appearance drop back a few years. 

"Lily has got you _so_ whipped," Sirius mumbled with a roll of his eyes. 

"What was that?" 

"Oh, nothing…" Sirius gazed at the ceiling with a look of irritance. Then his eyes lowered to look at Remus, and a smile spread across his face again, making his eyes shine. "So do you want to?" 

"Do you even know where to get coconuts and grass skirts, Sirius?" Remus asked with a doubtful voice but Sirius knew that he really wanted to go with the idea because his eyes were twinkling like they did when he was excited. But his question made Sirius pause and think. 

But only for a second. "No, but I bet we can find them at Hogsmeade." 

"Oh, come on, Hogsmeade? _Why_ would Hogsmeade have grass skirts and hula music? This is England, not Hawaii," James spoke up with a roll of his eyes as he pointed out the obvious. 

"Not yet it's not Hawaii," Sirius smirked. "Come on, you only turn forty once! We want to make this a birthday for her to remember!" 

"I'm sure that Professor McGonagall will have a nice enough birthday without your help Sirius," James said, but he was smiling now. 

"But she never goes out! She's like…she's like a hermit!" 

Remus burst out laughing, and even James grinned. "A hermit, Sirius? A hermit who is constantly surrounded by students and other Professors? Yeah, right…" Remus laughed. 

"You never know, she could work down at the Three Broomsticks on Saturday and Friday nights where she dresses up in tight clothes and flirts with the old drunken men from behind the bar," James smirked, and both Sirius and Remus groaned. 

"Bad, bad mental image!" Sirius covered his eyes and collapsed backwards onto his bed. "Distractions!" 

"So are you guys going to do it or not?" said a voice from the corner, making Sirius sit straight up and suffer from blood rush, and James and Remus whip their heads to the voice. 

"Quick! Sick Remus on it!" Sirius hissed, and he got up from his bed and reached out and pulled Remus towards the corner. 

"_You're _the dog," Remus hissed, "transform and attack it!" 

"Oh, but you're the wolf. Go kill it!" 

"Nice to know how you three'd handle attackers," the voice said and Lily's head appeared and was quickly followed by her body as she pulled off James's invisibility cloak, which she sharply tossed to him. He caught it and stared at her with a look of astonishment. "You really ought to keep your things hidden better, James," Lily replied to his look and pushed past the baffled Sirius and Remus to sit next to him. 

"How much did you hear?" Sirius managed to ask as soon as he and Remus had regained control of their adrenalin and managed to sit down. 

"Oh, all of it," she said and glared at Sirius. It took him a minute to realize she was frustrated over the 'whipped' comment and he grinned. 

"Are you going to help us, or are you going to ruin the whole thing by stopping us from getting the ingredients?" Sirius asked, and Lily raised an eyebrow. 

"Do you seriously think that I'd stop you? From what I heard, it sounds like this is a hilarious plan, and I'd love to be a part of it. But then if you refuse there is always blackmail…" she grinned with the grin that James hated but Sirius absolutely lived for. 

"Great," he said and began to explain the whole plan. "McGonagall's turning forty soon you know," and stopped as if waiting for her consent. 

"I'm not going to ask where you got this piece of information, but do go on." 

"I'm an expert eavesdropper. Anyway, we've decided to throw her a surprise party. A surprise _hula_ party. My uncle had one last year for my cousin's graduation. He's a Muggle you know. Anyway, it was awesome. The girls wear hula skirts and coconuts for bikini tops and dance around all happylike, and you get drinks with little umbrellas in them…" Sirius trailed off and was slapped back to reality by Remus with a punch in the arm. "Oh, right. Anyway, we thought it might be fun to have one for McGonagall, you know, we could all go and hide in her office and wait for her to come in and then surprise her. And then we could have a real hula party at Hogwarts," Sirius absolutely beamed at his idea. 

"And you actually think that McGonagall won't get mad and send us all back to the Gryffindor common room with detention and lost house points?" 

"Well…that is the downside…but maybe she'll be in a good mood?" Sirius grinned, and waved off Lily's explosion answer. 

"Anyway, Lil' do you have _any_ idea where to get hula music, grass skirts, and coconuts?" Sirius asked when Lily had calmed down. 

Lily rolled her eyes. "Oh, of course I do. Because every Saturday I sneak off and have my very own hula party…" 

"Why didn't you invite me?!" Sirius put on a hurt look that was answered by another roll of eyes from Lily. 

"Why don't you call up your uncle? Ask him where he got his Hawaiian supplies?" Remus suggested and a gasp from Sirius followed. 

"Remus! You're a genius!" 

"No, Sirius, you're just really stupid…" James said but Sirius appeared not to have heard his comment and was pacing back and forth mumbling to himself. (A/N: Rather a scary sentence, no?) 

"Right," Sirius said, and the three looked up at him, "get me paper and a quill and James I need to use your owl." 

_Dear Sirius-  
_

Hey! My dad and brother aren't home, actually they're on 'work' in Rome. Did you know that Adam's going to work for Dad's company? Yeah, my dad is thrilled. Anyway though, getting to the point… 

Dad got this magazine with all these party favors in them, and we just ordered the supplies from there. I sent the magazine with your owl, just write the things you want on that order form in the center (of the magazine I mean). If you don't know how to fill it out one of your friends should. Actually, have them do it anyway. I don't trust you. Send the magazine (and the completed form) back to me A.S.A.P. 

Well, I'd better go, I expect an owl back and maybe this time you could send it at night? Our neighbors so flipped when they saw an owl tapping on our window at six in the morning. Mom wasn't exactly happy, but she lightened up when I told her it was from you. Good luck with whatever you're doing… 

Love,   
Jessica  


PS. Tell your friends at Hogwarts 'Hi' for me! 

Sirius finished reading the letter and threw it on James's bed. 

"I wasn't done with that!" Peter squealed, and rushed over to James's bed to retrieve the letter and finish reading it. 

"What does she _mean_ she doesn't trust me? I'm the most reliable person in the world!" Sirius scowled, his face squishing up like it did when he glared. 

Lily's face broke into a smile over the top of the magazine that had been enclosed with the letter, and James and Remus burst out laughing. 

"You? Reliable?!" Remus hooted, and had to grasp the bedpost to keep his balance. 

"Yeah, right," James grinned, causing Sirius to squish his face up more. He started towards James, his face distorted and his fists clenched. James immediately took on Sirius's expression, and the two of them began fake boxing. 

"Psst, Remus," Lilly hissed, and Remus tore his glance away from Sirius, who had just been tripped and was now kicking at James from the floor, to Lily. She was sitting on James's bed and motioning for him to come look at the magazine with her. 

"C'mere, come look at this before those two idiots tear up the room," she said, and he trotted over. 

"Look," Lily pointed to a picture with a very chesty girl in a skimpy coconut bikini. The girl was bare from the bottom of the bikini to the top of her short hula skirt, which was made out of grass that looked as if it might fall off at any moment. 

"Uhh…Lily, is there something we need to tell James?" Remus asked, glancing at Lily from the corner of his eye. 

"No, you idiot," Lily punched Remus in the arm, "is _this_ the outfit Sirius was talking about? Because I don't think we can wear this kind of stuff in Hogwarts…" 

"Well it is a _surprise_ party," Remus said, his cheeks slowly gaining more blood in them. 

Lily gave an annoyed sigh, but what she was going to say was drowned out by a huge bang as Sirius landed flat on James, in apparently what was supposed to be a bodyslam. 

"Sirius, you idiot!" Lily hissed, tossed the magazine under the bed, grabbed James's invisibility cloak and rushed into the corner. 

"What did she do _that_ for?" Sirius asked, but his question was answered when the door was swung open abruptly, and a Prefect rushed in. 

"_What_ is going on in here?" The girl asked, much resembling Professor McGonagall with her eyes wide and nose in the air. 

"Umm…nothing…" Sirius spurted, and caused the other two (Peter was still reading) to let out sighs of exasperation. 

"We're just re-arranging the room, and Sirius dropped James's trunk," Remus lied, as Lily, hidden underneath the invisibility cloak, pushed the trunk into view. 

"Uh-huh," Sirius nodded, and regaining composure, "I shouldn't have eaten that last butter roll for lunch! Those things sure make your fingers oily. Want to see?" He stuck his fingers in the girl's face, and she quickly backed away. 

"Ugh…no. Just…be quiet…and…don't let him touch anything else," she pointed to Sirius as she reached for the door, and then she fled the room, slamming the door behind her. 

"Nice job, Sirius," James said sarcastically, "Uhh…nothing…" He mimicked Sirius in his moment of spotlight. 

"Hey shut up," Sirius took another swing at James, who dodged it and was about to retaliate but was stopped when Lily came out from under the invisibility cloak. 

"Not," she grabbed Sirius's arm and shoved her face up to his, "again!" 

"Okay, okay!" Sirius backed away and tripped over James's trunk. "OW! Who was stupid enough to move this thing here?!" 

Lily gave out an annoyed sigh, and helped Sirius to his feet. "I did. Will you please just go sit on the bed with Remus?" She pointed over to where Remus was sitting on James's bed, staring at the magazine with a strange expression on his face, his ears very red. She rolled her eyes and shoved Sirius over to him. 

"Nice job," came a voice from behind her, as two arms slid their way around her waist, and the voice came very close to her ear, "get them out of the way and we can - OOF!" 

James was cut off with an elbow in the stomach from Lily. "I am _not_ in the mood. Go sit on the bed!" She pointed to where Sirius and Remus were hovering over the Hawaiian magazine, both wearing identical expressions. 

"Sure honey," James tried again, and went over to Sirius's bed and laid down. "Okay, now what?" 

"_James_," Lily hissed, "Go sit over _there_!" She pointed again to where Remus and Sirius were, and gave another exasperated sigh. "Fine!" She strode over to them and ripped the magazine from their hands. She ignored the "Hey!" from both of them, and marched over to Peter's desk. (It was of course the neatest; the other three by far were not even close to being organized.) 

"If you want to see the magazine, grab some chairs and _quietly_ come over here," she commanded, and gritted her teeth as Remus and Sirius sprung up from the bed and rushed across the room for chairs, knocking several things over in the process. They screeched their chairs to a stop next to her, quickly followed by James and Peter. 

"I like these tops," Sirius grabbed the magazine and flipped to a page where several girls, all of them very extensive in the chest area, were dancing in coconut tops that were way too small, and skirts that were way too short. "Let's get them." Nodding from James and Remus, but a surprising remark from Peter followed his statement. 

"They're a little small, don't you think?" The three other boys looked at him with huge eyes and open mouths. "That's the point…" James explained slowly, and Peter, his ears quickly gaining more blood, followed with an: "Oh." 

"At least one of you has some sense," Lily smiled at Peter, but the other three glared at him. 

"That's not what I'm thinking he's got…" Sirius mumbled, and James and Remus snickered quietly. 

"Anyway," Lily glared at Sirius, "_if_ we do get these tops," she pointed to the picture, "then we have to get some that fit. And - " 

"How are we going to do that?" Sirius interrupted. "Oh, I know! We'll measure you, and Molly and Arabella and then average out the numbers!" His suggestion was followed with nodding from Remus and laughing from James. "Yeah right," James chuckled, "Fat chance you'll get a measurement out of her!" He pointed to Lily. "She won't even let me - " 

"Okay!" Lily stopped him, her face slowly turning red, "Enough!! That's a terrible idea that would _never_ work! We'll just order a bunch of every size, and those that don't fit won't be worn." She ripped the order form out from the center of the magazine and grabbed a quill. Checking the page number and item number, she began scribbling on the paper. Behind her back, James and Remus were doubled over in silent laughter as Sirius mimicked Lily, his hands parallel to his chest, but a foot out. He imitated Lily ordering people around, but as he turned his body, his hands smacked James and Sirius. 

"Stop it," Lily commanded, without even turning around. "Sirius you know I can hurt you, and if you keep doing that, I really will. So I would recommend that you stop." Sirius immediately did stop, and rubbed his arm where Lily had punched him a couple of days ago. "Sorry, Lily," he said quietly, and smacked the other two when they kept laughing. "She's mean!" He mouthed, and was backhanded in his chest by Lily. 

"What do you think about these?" Lily pointed to a page with really thick, really long grass skirts. The three boys exchanged glances, and Remus grabbed the book tenderly, his eyes watching Lily's hands. 

"What about this page?" He turned to a page with really thin, really short grass skirts. "These are nice," he said softly, and the other two nodded. Peter just pursed his lips, preferring not to comment. 

"No," Lily said and grabbed the book back: "I let you have your skimpy bikini tops, now I get to pick out the skirts. These are the skirts we are going to get," she turned back to the page that she had previously been on, and grabbed the order form. She quickly filled it out, and gave the magazine to the boys. "Find some leis. Cheap ones preferably." 

"What's a lay?" Sirius whispered under his breath to James. "Not that I paid attention in grammar, but isn't lay a verb? As in, James la-" 

"No," Lily interrupted sharply, "a _lei_ is a noun. A lei is a Hawaiian necklace of flowers, such as these," she grabbed the magazine and flipped it to the back. A colorful page of flowers came into view. "Pick the cheapest ones you can find, and then we can decorate them when they get here." She turned back to the order form with another sigh. 

"I like the blue one," James said, his finger on a lei that was made out of three shades of blue flowers. "Oh…it says that _these_ leis are nine dollars - " 

"I can't see!" Peter protested and grabbed the magazine from James's hands. 

"Give that back!" Sirius whipped around and flailed his arms wildly as Peter kicked his chair back and ran across the room. 

"No! I want to see!" Peter called back and was immediately attacked by Remus. 

"I want to see, too! You can't even figure out the prices; if you haven't noticed, they're in dollars and cents!" Remus snatched the magazine and jumped on James's bed. 

"You'll pick the ugly ones! Give it to me!" Sirius grabbed at the magazine, but James snatched it out of Remus's hands. He quickly bounded over to Sirius's closet, and shut himself in. 

"Well that was a stupid thing to do," Remus put his arms down and stared at the shut closet door. "Who would want to be in Sirius's closet?" 

"Only those with good fashion sense, but I really don't know why James is in there…" Sirius's answer was, and he and Remus jumped down from the bed. 

"Fashion sense my eye," Lily scoffed, and the three boys jumped. They, in their moment of chaos, had forgotten she was there. "Let's leave him in there, he'll get all the punishment he deserves in _that_ pit," she motioned toward Sirius's closet. 

Before she had sat down again at Peter's desk, the door to Sirius's closet burst open, and James came out gasping for breath. "I've found some!" He exclaimed, waving the magazine triumphantly in his right hand. To Sirius he said, "When was the last time you cleaned that out?! It smells worse than Peter's shoes in there!" With that description, Remus scrunched up his nose, Peter narrowed his eyes, and Sirius beamed triumphantly. 

"Not since the first week of school…" he said proudly, and was answered with four groans. "…In first year." He finished. 

"Ewww!" Lily gagged, and the other three followed suit. "You're disgusting!" she strode over to the window and opened it, also closing the door to Sirius's closet and snatching the magazine from James on her way back to the desk. 

"Okay," she turned the subject, "which one did you like, James?" 

"These," James slapped the magazine on Peter's desk, and his fingers landed on a group of leis that were rainbow colored. Sirius immediately scoffed, and received a glare from Lily and James. 

"They're _ugly_," Sirius whined, and crossed his arms over his chest. 

"They are not. And why do you care anyway?" Lily raised her eyebrows at him, and he stuck out his chin. 

"Because this is _my_ party. _I_ am throwing it. _I_ get to pick out the leis," Sirius attempted to grab the magazine, but it was held tightly by Lily. 

"Sirius Ian Black, you let go of this magazine right now, or I'll - " 

"I'm filling out the papers!" Remus proclaimed in a singsong voice, the quill in his hand moving at a rapid pace. "I've filled them out!" He announced again, and Sirius let go of the magazine at a rapid pace, causing Lily to fall backwards on the desk. 

"You did _what_?! You ordered those ugly leis, didn't you?!" Sirius slowly advanced on Remus, until they were face to face. Remus simply grinned in reply, and extended the hand holding the order form out to Sirius. Sirius immediately snatched it, and howled when he had read the form. 

"You _did_!" He cried, a hand dramatically raising to his forehead. "Now what?! I'm going to have to wear an ugly lei! I'm not going to the party." Sirius folded his arms across his chest and glared at Remus. 

"Sirius, you forget we're wizards, and witches," James quickly added before Lily had a chance to open her mouth, "and we can easily change the color of the leis when they come. We just wanted to order the cheapest ones." 

Sirius preferred to ignore James, and continued to pout. "That's not the _point_," he whined again, and Lily rolled her eyes. 

"Sirius, just give me the order form," she sighed, and extended a hand for it. 

"No!" was Sirius's reply, and he quickly found a very hot-tempered Lily in his face. 

"Sirius Ian Black," she hissed, "you give me that order form _right_ now," her hand slowly crawled its way up his arm, until it had found the bruise that she had created several days before when she had punched him, "or I will give you a _permanent_ bruise in this - " She had to say no more. Sirius quickly thrust the paper into her hand, and backed away. 

"Thank you," she smiled, and her face turned smug, the pride obvious in her grin. She sidestepped Sirius, and made her way across the dormroom. "I'm going up to the Owlry," she announced before she turned the doorhandle, and turned around to face the boys. "Would anyone like to come?" She stared pointedly at James, and his eyes lit up and he quickly strode over to her. 

"I would!" he grinned when he reached her, and turned back to the others with a wider grin. Sirius, obviously over the whole "Mean Lily" streak, waggled his eyebrows at James, bidding his friend farewell, and good luck. James was about to reply, but Lily cut him off by grabbing his hand and dragging him out the door, and the couple disappeared. 

"But _I_ wanted to go too," Peter whined, looking forlorn as he stared at the door. 

"Trust me on this one Peter, no you didn't." Remus smiled, and Peter's eyebrows drew together. 

"But why?" Peter asked, and Remus's cheeks gained color in them. He offered no answer, so Peter turned to Sirius, who was waiting eagerly. 

"A little thing, my friend," Sirius slung his arm around Peter's shoulder as he headed for the common room, dragging Peter along with him, "called the birds and the bees…" 

Remus rolled his eyes and got up to follow the Sirius and Peter, the former who was preparing himself for a long speech, and the latter whom Remus felt extremely sorry for. Remus shook his head, and pulled the dormroom door shut behind him, heading into what was obviously going to be chaos. For the next two weeks. 


	2. Aloha!

~*@*~ 

Sirius reached into the vast box and pulled out a pair of coconuts, which he immediately strapped to his chest. 

"How do I look?" he modeled, twirling and pivoting like a very drunk model. Not that Sirius _was_ drunk, but he sure did know how to act like one. 

"Oh, you _really_ should apply for a modeling agency after Hogwarts, Sirius," Lily grinned, her voice dripping in sarcasm. She too dug into the box, and began pulling out numerous coconut tops, grass skirts, and leis. 

"You think so? American or British?" He asked, twirling again on the table that he stood on. 

"American. They'd be more likely to take you," Lily answered, not looking up from the box. She gave an armful of leis to Remus, who was busy coloring the flowers multiple shades. Already a large pile sat next to him, of green, blue, yellow, pink, and dozens of other countless and probably unnamable colors. 

Sirius hopped off of the table and bounced over to Remus, where he grabbed a handful of leis. He placed them over his head, and around his neck, and hopped back on the table again. 

"Improvement?" He asked, and Lily turned to look. 

"Yes," she grinned, "very Hawaiian. They work especially well with your black hair and tan skin." She turned back around, rolling her eyes, the grin still intact on her face. She shoved a pile of coconut tops to James, who was busy arranging them according to size. 

"Lily," he whined, "why can't _you_ do this? This is boring! They all look the same size to me!" Lily, rolling her eyes, zigzagged between the piles of tops over to where James was standing. She let out a sigh when she saw his sorting. 

"James, _darling_," she smiled, "the tops simply say on the back," she turned one over to show him, "the size. See? 34, this one says. You simply put number 34 in one pile, and then grab another top, like so." She reached behind her, grabbed a handful of them, and turned another one over. "32," she read, and placed it in a new pile. Turning over another one, she read, "34. Now James, what do we do with this one?" She smiled sweetly up at him, and he grabbed the top, and placed it with the other 34. "Very good!" She praised, and shoved the other tops into his arms. She walked back over to the huge box, avoiding objects that were strewn all over the common room floor. 

"Lily, what are we going to do with all this when everyone wakes up?" Peter asked as Lily handed him a pile of grass skirts that were in desperate need of being separated. 

"Hopefully, by the time everyone wakes up, we'll be long gone. It's only," she looked at her watch, "2 o'clock. Hopefully everyone will be asleep until at least six, so that gives us four hours. We can get it done." 

"I mean what are we going to do with it all after we're done sorting them and stuff?" Peter asked, and Lily smiled at him. 

"Hide it all." 

"Where?" 

"You'll see," she grinned, and Peter gulped. He turned back to his separating as soon as he was sure Lily was gone, back to her box. He really was anxious about this whole party, because if they got caught beforehand, he was sure to get the blame. He always did. Even if a Slytherin tripped over a rug in the bottom-most dungeon, it was always Peter's fault. He sighed. He - 

"BOO!" 

Lily screamed, and all heads whirled toward her. Sirius was hanging out of the box, doubled over laughing. Lily was yelling her head off at him, her face very red. 

"SIRIUS IAN BLACK, GET OUT OF THAT BOX RIGHT NOW! HOW DARE YOU SCARE ME LIKE THAT! YOU IDIOT, I CAN'T BELIEVE - " She was cut off when James put a hand over her mouth, only managing to muffle the screams. 

"Lily," he hissed, "you're going to wake up the whole - " But it was too late. Dozens of students swarmed out of their dorms, trying to see what was going on, and who had screamed. The Prefect that had investigated their dorm earlier pushed to the front of the crowd, her face almost as flushed as Lily's. 

"You again!" she hissed, but was drowned out with laughter and applause, because Sirius had hopped back onto the table again, wearing nothing but the coconut top and the grass skirt, and of course the several leis he had pilfered. He was, indeed, dancing, Hawaiian style, and, of course, this caused an uproar from the crowd. He seemed to be enjoying the attention, the audience appeared to be enjoying the show, and everyone was extremely surprised when Lily herself joined Sirius on the table. 

"Take it off!" A male voice shouted from the crowd, and Lily felt her face gaining more blood in rapid speed. 

"Yeah, Lil', take it off!" Sirius grinned, and his hands found their way to her shirt, but before they could do any damage, a shrill whistle was heard, and all eyes turned to the maker of the noise. James's face flushed, but luckily, the attention was stolen from him as soon as it was gained. 

"Thank you!" Lily said, grinning at him. All eyes were on her now, and her face began gaining blood again. She pushed the fact away, and began in a loud voice. "I'm glad you're here because - " 

"Take it off!" a male shouted again, but he was quickly muffled and bruised by the people around him. Lily continued. 

"Because, as you all know, this Wednesday is Professor McGonagall's fortieth birthday." The crowd began commenting, but they were drowned out as Lily began again in a louder voice, "And, for celebration, we've decided, well actually, it was Sirius's idea, to throw her a hula party, hence the decorations on - " 

She was again drowned out, as the audience began clapping and cheering. Sirius, taking the advantage, started dancing again, and Lily was quickly knocked off the table by his sharp hip movements. She hopped back on again, and pushed Sirius off. The crowd, quickly seeing their dancer gone, hushed immediately. 

"Thank you. So, if you'll please _quietly_," she enunciated the word, "form lines, you can all receive your supplies. JAMES," she shouted the word, making her voice heard about the rising chatter. She quickly reached down and pulled Sirius back on the table with her, "has the coconut tops," she pointed to the pair on Sirius, "REMUS has the leis, please be very patient with him, he is coloring them as we speak, and not everyone can have the color they want. And PETER has the grass skirts," she pointed to the skirt on Sirius, which was drooping and looking as if it might fall off at any moment. She quickly reached down and pulled it back up, much to the crowd's disappointment. 

"BEFORE," she shouted over the 'awwws', "you get your items, PLEASE remember that if we don't have your size, you can always enhance everything for your preference. Now, if you'll please make lines - " Lily, for the third time, was drowned out by the crowd as the talk broke out and the chaos began. She sighed, giving up, and rushed over to help her friends. 

~*@*~ 

By the end of supper on Tuesday night, the entire school, unfortunately including the Slytherins, had hula supplies. Lily, James, Remus, and Peter were exhausted, completely worn out from distributing, altering designs, and cloning missing decorations. They were sprawled out by the fire in the empty common room; each relieved for the peace that they hadn't had for two days. 

"Tomorrow already," James stated, his head resting on a huge overstuffed pillow that he had stolen from one of the couches. 

"Mm-hmm," Lily let her eyes remained closed, she being extremely relaxed, with her head on James's stomach and her arms wrapped around his chest. 

"I hope everything goes all right," Peter mumbled, and everyone silently nodded. 

"Where's Sirius?" Remus asked, not moving or sounding concerned, because without Sirius, they were allowed quiet. 

"Dunno," Lily mumbled into James's chest, not really caring either, but enjoying the quiet and seclusion they had from the rest of the school, and possibly the loudest member of it. 

"I'm glad that we're - " Lily started, turning her head so she could speak better. However, it wasn't needed, because no one could hear her, due to Sirius bursting into the common room, followed by a group of what had to be fifty people. The four sat up immediately, ignoring their blood rushes and trying to make out what Sirius had gotten into now. 

He led a very happy group of people that were singing and dancing, celebrating for something, obviously. Lily stiffened. He wouldn't… He surely wouldn't start the party a day _early_. 

But luckily, as her eyes re-adjusted, she saw that no one was wearing Hawaiian costumes, but everyone was carrying something edible or drinkable. She sighed, relieved. Food was one thing they had forgotten, but leave it up to Sirius and food was always remembered. The four slowly got up off the floor, stretching their muscles and giving huge sighs. Sirius, seeing them, rushed over. 

"I've got food!" He grinned, and Lily rubbed her temples. She could just feel the headache vibes coming from Sirius, and landing on her. 

"I see that," she commented, and took the bottle from Sirius's hand. She read the label, and lazily handed the bottle back to him. Luckily, nothing alcoholic. "Where'd you get it? The kitchen?" She stretched again, leaning on James for support. 

"No. Hogsmeade!" Sirius grinned, and Lily tensed for the second time that night. Sirius really was going to kill her. Her muscles shouldn't be going through all this in five minutes. 

"_Hogsmeade_, Sirius?" She raised her eyebrows, and he nodded. "Sirius, it's not only not a weekend, but it's a school-night. How did you get this from The Three Broomsticks?" 

"Easy. I just walked right in and asked for it." He explained, as if it was the simplest thing in the world. 

"And they gave it to you." Lily finished dryly, not believing his story for a second. 

"Mm-hmm!" He grinned, and before Lily could chastise him for lying to her, he left. He, leading the crowd up to the boys' dorm, commanded them to put all the food in there until tomorrow night. 

Sighs came from James, Remus, and Peter, and Lily felt her pity go to them. "Don't worry, boys," she smiled sympathetically, "it's only one more day." And she tried hard to convince herself of that fact. 

~*@*~ 

Professor McGonagall woke up, as always, at five o'clock. She walked slowly over to her bedroom mirror, and looked into it. S_o this is what it's like to be forty_, she mused, turning her head as if to catch it from all angles. _Happy Birthday to me then. I just hope no one remembers…_ She sighed, and began to put her hair up in its usual bun. 

~*@*~ 

For a day in the life of the Marauders, it went by smoothly. They had only lost Gryffindor 15 points, Sirius had only blown up one cauldron (unfortunately, belonging to James), James had only managed to injure one Slytherin, and one very noisy Gryffindor, Peter had only been late for two classes, and Remus had only started one-half of a food fight (it was among the four boys, of course). According to Lily, however, the trauma would begin at eight-thirty. The deadline of the scheduled party, of course. So far, Lily hadn't seen a single hula decoration, for which she was extremely thankful. One trip along the way, and the troop was in for some serious trouble. No pun intended, of course. 

~*@*~ 

At eight, after they were absolutely positive no one was left eating, they snuck into the Great Hall. They were using the Great Hall in improvisation, because due to the excessive amount of people, McGonagall's office was definitely too small for a party of that size. The Great Hall would work, if they could pull it off. 

"Lily, where should we hang _this_ banner?" James and Remus drug a large banner, which was glittering and glowing in neon colors of yellow, red, and green. "Happy 40th", it read, with a giant picture of McGonagall on the front. Courtesy of Sirius, of course. 

"Mmm," Lily hummed, glancing around the half-decorated room, and then back at the immense banner. "There," she announced, her finger pointed at the stage. James and Remus gave sighs, and began dragging their poster across the room. "Pick it up, don't drag it!" she cried, and, after shooting her glares, they did. 

"Lil', come help me with this!" Peter cried, attempting to drag a huge box across the room. Lily rushed over, and she and Peter started to pull the box. They only got three feet before Lily gave out an annoyed sigh, and stopped. 

"Peter, what's _in_ here?" she demanded, and he shrugged. 

"Dunno," he raised his eyebrows, "Sirius left it in the dormroom with a note. The note said not to open the box until we find the perfect spot for it. Then the note said to open it, but not to open the second box. I don't know what the heck that means, but let's just find a spot to put this stupid thing!" He started to push the box again, but Lily stopped him. With an "Oh, this is stupid", she took out her wand and easily moved the box over to a corner. Then she and Peter trotted over to where it was sitting. 

They began unwrapping the massive brown box, and gasped when they had finally uncovered its contents. 

"It's a present!" Lily exclaimed, peering over the sides to see the gift box that was inside. It was wrapped with colors of orange and yellow, each glittering as if they were in the sun. They were very tropical colors, and Lily wasn't at all surprised to see a coconut attached to the card on top. She stood on tiptoe to reach the card, being careful not to rip it, and dictated: 

"To Professor Minerva McGonagall. Do not open until party starts. Then, open immediately." She laughed, and obeying the instructions, shoved the present gingerly aside. 

"Lilly! Get over here and help us with this food!" Remus's voice carried across the room, and Lily and Peter obeyed the command. 

"Where's Sirius?" Lily asked, glancing between James and Remus, who were unloading bottles and bottles of liquid. James jumped at her question, dropping a bottle on the floor. He cursed, and quickly cleaned the mess up, with the help of his wand, of course. 

"Dunno," he mumbled before he dug into the box again. Lily rolled her eyes, and turned to Remus. 

"Do _you_ know?" she smiled at him, and his eyes quickly lowered from her face. Instead of answering, he too reached into the box and began drawing out more bottles. 

"_Boys_?" she hissed, her voice deepening with her temper. They both gulped, but refrained from answering. "If you don't tell me where Sirius is, I swear I'll - " she quickly took a step forward, but was stopped by Remus's words. 

"Really Lily, he won't do any harm. He can't hurt anything anyway, it's too late now." He stopped, and thought more carefully at his next phrase. "I mean, he's planning a surprise, but don't worry - it's a good one! It won't hurt anyone! Really!" He said the last part extremely fast, holding his hands in front of his chest as if to protect himself. 

Lily gave a huge sigh, regretting what she was about to do. Then, slowly taking a cleansing breath, she too reached into the box, and began drawing out bottles. 

~*@*~ 

The guests arrived by eight twenty-eight. They simply couldn't wait a moment later, and the Marauders (minus Sirius and including Lily) simply couldn't hold the doors any longer. The entire school came, including the Slytherins, and all the professors. And all were clad in Hawaiian designs. How the Professors got a hold of the clothes, no one knew, especially the hosts of the party. 

How Professor McGonagall arrived was a story in itself. The Marauder's scheduled plan (of James setting a dung bomb off outside her office, and then leading her down to the Great Hall, very childish, but it would work) wasn't needed, because McGonagall arrived on her own. Or, almost on her own. 

"Minerva, you must see it, it is truly a disaster! The banners torn down, and the tables broken! Some horrible vandals, I can't talk about it. Come see for yourself!" cried the voice outside the Great Hall door, and everyone within froze. For the voice belonged to Albus Dumbledore, who certainly hadn't been invited, but then again, none of the professors had, either. And they absolutely had _not_ done any of those things, they wouldn't_ dream_ of it, why would Dumbledore say that they had? 

The door to the Great Hall swung open, and in came a very enraged McGonagall. Silence filled the Great Hall when she stopped abruptly, her mouth gaping and her eyes taking up the decorations. The silence was broken by Dumbledore, himself. 

"Surprise!" He shouted, and everyone joined in until a chorus of "Surprise!"'s had been yelled. Then the music started, but, of course, no one moved. They were all staring at McGonagall, who was still open-mouthed and frozen to the ground. Then, she surprised them, by doing the last possible thing that they thought she would do. 

She laughed. 

And pretty soon, the Great Hall erupted with laughter, because the sight of their strict, hard-nosed teacher laughing was worth the whole party, planning and all. Then everyone danced, and talked, and the party had really started, for the first time. 

Peter, Remus, and James followed Lily, who was carrying colorful leis and various other Hawaiian decorations, up to where Professor McGonagall was standing. 

"Here, Professor," she said timidly, handing the decorations to McGonagall, who was now wiping tears from her eyes. She, dabbing her eyes a bit more, took the decorations from Lily, and swung several multi-colored leis around her neck. 

"Was this your idea?" she asked, sniffling a bit, and definitely not looking like the proper woman she usually was. 

"Well…no, actually. It was Sirius's. And then Remus and he convinced James to go along with it, and of course, Peter and I followed along. I don't know where he is though, he - " But she was cut off, as their Transfiguration Professor swooped Lily up into a very un-McGonagall like hug. Lily was actually struck dumb for a few seconds, before she awkwardly patted McGonagall on the back. 

"Thank you, all of you! This is so…so, unexpected, and…thank you!" She sniffled again, and Lily was completely convinced that their teacher had been abducted, or was under the influence of some very strong drink. 

"Isn't there any cake?" Came Peter's voice, and Lily jumped. 

"The box!" She gasped, and zigzagged through the crowd to where the mysterious box had been sitting. "We were supposed to open it at the beginning of the party, but I suppose now is as good as a time as ever. Why don't _you_ open it, Professor?" She turned to McGonagall, who had followed the quartet over to the large multi-colored box. 

"Well…all right," she agreed, and slowly began opening the box. The Great Hall, its attention caught, grew quiet, and all eyes were on the box, and McGonagall. 

She finished with the wrapping paper, and pulled the sides of the box off. The entire population of Hogwarts gasped, because inside, was the _biggest_ cake anyone had ever seen, complete with coconuts and dancing Hula girls, little umbrellas that go in drinks and leis made of frosting. It was a masterpiece. 

Dumbledore appeared beside them, holding a very large cake-knife. He slowly pressed it into McGonagall's hand, and whispered, "Cut it." 

And she did, gently slicing the knife through the top layer, avoiding all of the beautiful decorations and simply choosing a spot with white frosting. When she had finished cutting a small piece, and had drawn the knife out of the cake, a very unexpected and startling thing happened. The cake exploded. 

Frosting flew everywhere, little Hawaiian dancers showered the crowd, and umbrellas floated through the air, and all covered the Great Hall with cake. And, in the midst of where the cake had stood, was now standing Sirius Black. Wearing nothing but several leis, a coconut bra, and a grass skirt. 

The entire Great Hall gasped, and then burst out in insane laughter, and the laughter crescendoed when Sirius shouted, "Happy Birthday!" and began dancing. 

McGonagall's only words were, "My cake…". Sirius crawled out of the wreckage, and enveloped the Professor in a hug, coating her with frosting and cake. "Happy fortieth!" He exclaimed, grinning that grin that made several girls feel light-headed. Or maybe it was his outfit, or the lack of one. 

McGonagall looked at the boy that had coated her in frosting, and in a low voice said, "Sirius Ian Black. You have not only gathered the whole population of Hogwarts for an _illegal_ party, you have not only ordered Muggle supplies from a Muggle state, _also_ illegal, told the whole school that I was turning forty, embarrassed me in front of the entire staff," here she glanced at Dumbledore, who was eating some cake that had gotten entangled in his beard, "but you have _ruined_ my birthday cake. What have you to say for yourself?" 

"Aloha?" Sirius grinned again, and McGonagall shook her head, her eyes twinkling but her face frowning. 

"A surprise, indeed. But, it was a good one, and perhaps the best one ever pulled, in good will, that is, at Hogwarts. Congratulations, Mr. Black." And she too grinned, a seldom smile lighting up her face, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief. She turned to the crowd, her happiness evident, and said, "You didn't think I was going to _punish_ him, did you?" And everyone laughed, all of them avoiding McGonagall's eyes. 

"Well, if I may say so myself," she raised her voice, "Let the party begin!" And she stole a lei from Sirius, and began wandering into the dancing throng. But she stopped suddenly, as if she had forgotten something. She whirled around, and with a grin on her face, said, "Aloha, Sirius." Then, she turned back around, and disappeared into the chaos. 

~*@*~ 

"That was fun," Sirius announced, throwing himself onto a chair in the Gryffindor common room. The other four looked at him wearily; each stretched out on chairs. They were entirely worn out from the party last night, which had lasted early into the morning, when finally Dumbledore had announced that the party was over, and that the Great Hall had to be cleaned thoroughly if anyone wanted breakfast. Everyone left with great speed, leaving the Marauders, plus Lily, to clean up. Which they did, with the help of the Professors, and magic. 

"Yes, that was fun," Lily agreed, settling her head on James's shoulder. 

"You know," Sirius said, sitting up, "a little owl told me that Professor Binns's 100th is coming up pretty soon…" And he was promptly cut off and drowned by pillows, and several "Sirius!!"'s. 

~*@*~ 

The End, finally! Yay! Sorry it took me SO long to finish this story, but I haven't written much of HP since school started! ::hides in a corner for a moment:: But, if you'll forgive me since I've posted it, I'll say a few more words. 

This story is dedicated to Beth, who proofread it and gave me all the confidence to post the add-ons! Thanks Beth!! 

Anyway, thanks to everyone who reviewed the first part, and thanks (in advance) to everyone who reviews (or flames) the second part! Thanks for reading this, and thanks even more for reviewing (even though you don't have to, there's no pressure : ) 


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